Tuesday, July 1, 2014

Why I write {blog hop}

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For me writing is cathartic. I can work through my feelings a lot better when I see them on a page (or screen) in front of me. Its like a huge brain dump and god knows I need a bucket load of brain dumps having been through what I have in life.

I write to record my memories. In a way my childhood was cut short the moment that dad died when I was 10. Unfortunately we didn't spend much time with our parents before then because of school and their business. If I had've known something horrible like that was going to happen I would've tried so hard to make more lasting memories. The thing I miss most in life is not having many memories of dad and not having many memories of us together as a family. My relationship with my mum has also been strained and shes not huge on talking about the past or being affectionate so I feel I've missed out there too. I'm determined to write my memories down so that in the future if they happen to fade I have a place to go where they can be brought back to life. It's also a backup if, god forbid, something ever happened to me my daughter would have a record of my thoughts so she wouldn't need to go through life wondering what I was like, the way I have with dad.

I write to leave a footprint. I have a deeply engrained desire to leave my footprint on the world. It stems from my childhood. I feel like when my dad died his memory died too. Apart from my immediate family I doubt many other people know anything about him or even know he existed. Its like he just vanished and nobody noticed. I don't what that to happen to me. I don't want to save the world, but I do hope to leave some kind of tiny legacy behind - even if it's just this little blog and my family.

Now for the blog hop questions...

What am I working on?

I'm working on so many things for July. We have a very special birthday coming up so I'm knee deep in party planning (and its going to be EPIC, just sayin) so that will definitely be featuring on the blog at some point. I have a number of awesome products lined up for Mummy Must Haves and as always I have my 52 weeks of memories photography posts on Wednesdays each week. I also have a couple of really exciting partnerships coming up in the next few months. As well as doing a few guest posts. Phew, somewhere in there I have to look after my 11 month old and try to sleep!

How does my writing differ from others in my genre?

I've had a lot of feedback from readers that they appreciate that my posts are so honest. I always thought that everybody wrote that way, but I'm guessing from the comments I get that not everyone does? I write my posts as if I'm talking directly to a friend or reflecting on a memory. They're raw and not sugar coated. I also post about topics that aren't generally discussed in everyday conversations (like infertility and depression). I guess maybe people appreciate the fact that I'm not afraid to tell it like it is and lay my soul bare in a way.

Why do I write what I do?

Being a personal blogger all my inspiration comes directly from my life. Unfortunately my life has been touched in many negative ways, but also in many good ways. I write about both.

I don't hide the bad because I don't want people (including my daughter) to think life is all rainbows and fairies and that nothing bad ever happens. I also want her and others to understand why I am the way I am. I don't hide the bad because it has made me who I am today. I share my stories because I have triumphed over the bad times. I want others to know they can too.

I also write about the good. Because frankly my blog would be depressing if I didn't, but also everybody needs a little hope. There were times in my life I've thought that there wasn't anything good to look forward to, then everything changed for the better. I want others to know that they can have that chance too. I want people to know that despite the pitfalls in life there's always something to look forward to.

How does my writing process work?

Ha, there's meant to be a process? I say that in jest! I have a very loose process. Most of my posts (ok all of them) are written on my laptop on my couch. Either late at night when I should be taking advantage of baby free time and sleeping; or during the day when the baby is sleeping on my lap. I generally plan what I'm going to write at least a week before, but sometimes there are spur of the moment posts when I get an awesome idea and can get it typed up super quick. But, given I have a baby who dictates how I spend most of my day, it takes all kind of miracles for that to happen.


I always remember being taught how to construct an essay in English class so I tend to keep that in mind when I write a blog post. I like everything to have a beginning, middle and end. Sometimes I may not hit the mark completely, but I aim to. Then I spend hours editing and over analysing my own work (please tell me other people do this too).


Who's next? 

I've asked 3 of my favourite bloggers to play along.



Emma writes at Five Degrees of Chaos. Emma's a mum to five gorgeous girls Maya, Sienna, Mercedes, Chiara and Rosalia. She shares stories about her large family and what its like raising five girls (two of which unfortunately have serious health problems). You'll find recipe's, great photography, parenting tales and an insight into what its like having children with anxiety and epilepsy.

Peta writes at Great Googa Moogas. Peta is a mum of seven! 3 boys and 4 girls (and also angel baby Logan). Peta writes about her large family and shares money and sanity saving tips to help other mums and families. With seven kids shes got A LOT of hints to pass on.

Maria writes at Mummy Goes Mad. Maria is mum to Locky and has another on the way. I feel like I can relate to her being the same age and our babies are relatively close in age. Maria is relatively new on the blogging scene and I've enjoyed reading her blog, you should check it out if you haven't already.

Thanks to Lauren for nominating me, now I'm passing the blog hop baton over to you ladies.


Toni xx


Linking up with Jess

23 comments:

  1. Lovely post Toni, I think being honest and authentic is the heart of blogging xx

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  2. I agree writing is so cathartic. I have always loved writing and used to be that little girl who wrote in her secret diaries all the time lol. My blog is primarily a beauty blog so I try to balance my need for 'cathartic writing' every once in a while xx

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    1. I used to write in diaries too. Its pretty cool when Im spring cleaning and find them in a random box somewhere. Reading them takes me straight back to being a teenager.

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  3. I really love this series, it is great to see so many bloggers share their why. I find the whole similar yet different aspect quite intriguing. Thanks for sharing

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    1. Its been an interesting series.

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  4. Ahh Toni! So many times when I read your writing I want to give you a massive hug!!! I think what you are doing with this blog and the reasons behind it are so special. I loved meeting you IRL recently and hope we can catch up again in the future. Also saying hi via #teamIBOT

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    1. Yea definitely and hopefully Hayley will be awake next time!

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  5. Yes isn't the process question a good one, as if we have a process, we are too busy trying to do so much other crap. Sorry to hear about your dad, love your reasons for writing!

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    1. Exactly theres too many other things to organise each day thats why I end up writing late at night (which is what Im doing tonight!).

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  6. I really loved reading this, Toni. I can identify with a lot of what you wrote about your reasons for writing and your writing process (I also have a small bub and I always try to make sure my posts have a beginning, a middle and an end!). While I have always felt that cathartic and creative side of writing, I had actually never really thought of blogging as a way of recording memories for my children later down the track and that really is such a beautiful reason. I'm so sorry to read that you lost your dad at such a young age. Like many of your readers have commented in the past, I also love the honesty that comes through your writing.

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    1. We have so much in common Lizzy!

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  7. That was beautiful. Thank you for sharing. So many people find it hard to share such details but I think it is good to get things off your chest and help others to relate to you. You never know how many people you will help by being open and honest. That's my motto in life, to be honest and open. Thank you so much for nominating me! I look forward to writing something up soon. x

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    1. At first I didn't think that my writing would have such an affect on others going through similar situations. But since I've got so many lovely comments from other people. who relate to the situations Ive been in, it spurs me on to share more because I know its helping others :)

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  8. This has been a really lovely series to follow along and get to know various bloggers in our network. I think your superpower is typing on the laptop with a baby on your lap! Can't imagine how that would work. And your bubby must find the sound of the keys hitting the keyboard very soothing to sleep so soundly through it each time ^_^

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    1. It works by typing with only one finger at a time (its a lot slower than typing when shes in bed). I'm pretty sure shes like her dad and could sleep through anything, its just getting her to sleep in the first place thats an issue.

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  9. Wow. I SO relate to your story. My dad died too, when I was only 5. The memories just are not there since I was so young. My mother, like yours, does not wish to really talk about him at all. I hear you, about longing to keep memories up for your daughter. I'm impressed by your honesty too! Thanks for sharing your post today! Blessings!

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    1. So much in common.It's certainly made me a lot more sentimental then I probably would've been if it didn't happen, but I guess thats a good thing.

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  10. Love the picture with your daughter. It is so true that writing can release your brain from so much excess! I do not know what I would do without it. I know you have learned to cherish the moments and your baby will be greatly blessed for it! Stopping by from #SITSSharfest

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    1. Yes thankgod for writing. Stops me from replaying everything over and over and over in my mind (sometimes anyway).

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  11. I wish that I had started blogging when I Mr 4 was a baby. I felt pretty isolated for those first few months, before I found my mum's group and I know how much writing can help. This blogging caper is so awesome sometimes!

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    1. It is awesome isn't it. I feel like I'm part of a huge community I never even knew existed before (oh what the normal people are missing out on!). I feel so connected to other bloggers as if we've been friends for years even though I've only met a couple in real life.

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  12. I'm just loving this series. Thanks so much for linking up for our Worth Casing blog of the month at Agent Mystery Case. We announce our winner later tonight and open up the link for August.

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