So, it is finally here. I officially no longer work. Technically I'm on annual leave for the next two weeks and then on maternity leave, but as of now I definitely don't have to go back to work at least for a year - but more than likely indefinitely. Its a weird feeling. In my head I still think that I'm just going on holidays for a month and then going back.
I've worked every spare day I've had since I was 16, including when I was going to university full time. I've always been responsible for my own income and my own expenses even when I didn't really have to be. I guess its my independent streak. I've always wanted to work and I could never really fathom the idea of sitting at home and not working.
Leaving work didn't go as planned. I was going to work as long as I was legally allowed to (because in my head I needed to make as much money as I could while I was still capable). I was going to have everything organised and pass over my store in pristine condition. Unfortunately, due to my body breaking down on me that didn't happen. My last shift ended up being two weeks ago, I just didn't know it would be my last shift at the time. Nothing was prepared properly for the handover and I didn't have time to say goodbye to my workmates. Completely not what I was expecting to happen. I guess that's the thing with pregnancy, it can be unpredictable. I mean getting pregnant never went to plan, so why would leaving go to plan? I should've expected that.
Nonetheless I'm now somewhat in limbo land. I'm not working and not yet a stay at home mum. I kind of still feel guilty about being at home and not working, yet I'm loving it at the same time. Being at home means I can stay in my pyjamas for the whole day if I want to (thankfully I don't get any random visitors ever). I've also noticed since I don't have to go to work I kind of forget to do my hair and well makeup is completely non existent. Its kind of refreshing not having to get dolled up each day, especially when I'm as big as a whale and feel anything but sexy.
Another good thing about leaving work is that I don't stress over stupid stuff any more. In fact I cant believe the crap that I did stress about. It all seems so trivial now. Oh and I LOVE not having to sit in traffic for up to two hours driving to and from work each day. I have so much more time. I was freaking out that nothing would be done before the baby was born and now I have nothing but time. Its awesome. I'm still not very good at relaxing or doing nothing like I apparently should be (according to the physio), but I'm getting quite good at doing stuff in my pyjamas. So I'm kind of half way there.
The best part is I don't have to work Christmas this year! It will be my first real Christmas and Boxing Day in twelve years! I cant wait. Bring on the next chapter.